When as a child I laughed and wept,

What happens when life becomes hopeless and meaningless? What happens when you're in a mess? How do you get out of the rut? How do you pick yourself up?

Because He Lives

God sent His son, they called Him Jesus
He came to love, heal and forgive
He lived and died, to buy my pardon
An empty grave is there to prove my Savior lives!


Because He lives, I can face tomorrow
Because He lives, all fear is gone
Because I know, I know He holds the future
And life is worth the living, just because He lives


How sweet to hold, a newborn baby
And feel the pride, and joy he gives
But greater still, the calm assurance
This child can face uncertain days, because He lives!


Because He lives, I can face tomorrow
Because He lives, all fear is gone
Because I know, I know He holds the future
And life is worth the living, just because He lives


And then one day, I'll cross the river
I'll fight life's final war with pain
And then as death, gives way to victory
I'll see the lights of glory, and I'll know He lives!


Because He lives, I can face tomorrow
Because He lives, all fear is gone
Because I know, I know He holds the future
And life is worth the living, just because He lives (:

It is a love relationship.

This is part of the introduction from the book 'The Jesus Storybook Bible' by Sally Lloyd-Jones:

Now, some people think the Bible is a book of rules, telling you what you should do and shouldn't do. The Bible certainly does have some rules in it. They show you how life works best. But the Bible isn't mainly about you and what you should be doing. It's about God and what He has done.
Other people think the Bible is a book of heroes, showing you people you should copy. The Bible does have some heroes in it, but (as you'll soon find out) most of the people in the Bible aren't heroes at all. They make some big mistakes (sometimes on purpose). They get afraid and run away. At times they are downright mean.
No, the Bible isn't a book of rules, or a book of heroes. The Bible is most of all a Story. It's an adventure story about a young Hero who comes from a far country to win back his lost treasure. It's a love story about a brave Prince who leaves his palace, his throne-- everything-- to rescue the one he loves. It's like the most wonderful of fairy tales that has come true in real life!
You see, the best thing about the Story is-- it's true.
There are lots of stories in the Bible, but all the stories are telling one Big Story. The Story of how God loves his children and comes to rescue them.
It takes the whole Bible to tell this Story. And at the center of the Story, there is a baby. Every Story in the Bible whispers his name. He is like the missing piece in a puzzle-- the piece that makes all the other pieces fit together, and suddenly you can see a beautiful picture.

Isn't it startling to think of God's word in such a perspective? All these while, I must admit, I have been thinking that the Bible is about me and what I should be doing. But that's not the way it is. The Bible is about God and what He has done.

Try reading the Bible in this perspective. It might change how we understand the word and how we see God's hands in our lives.

I met a friend today. And I came to a realisation. That really, being a Christian is not just about professing your faith. It is what you do and how you have changed lives because your life has been changed.

Stepping out of school has forced me to grow up. In fact, everyday of our lives we are being forced to grow up. We can choose to ignore that nudge, we can choose to procrastinate. But when we are placed in a situation where we can no longer play ignorance or procrastinate, you know it is REALLY time to grow up.

Some people are not strong enough. They are unable to cross that barrier. Some manage to overcome and they emerge stronger than before. Encouragement and support from loved ones play a major role, but strength and courage from God should be the main power source.

I am facing an obstacle now. So often, I feel helpless and unsure. This loneliness and aimlessness drive me to tears. I find it so difficult to stand up and walk on my own because I suddenly realise, that all this while, I have not been walking on my own. I am still stuck at the crawling stage. The temptation to give up is overwhelming and self pity drops by so frequently that it probably became my buddy without even me knowing it.

But today, my friend reminded me that I'm not alone. How many out there go through worse trials than I do? How many out there face similar situations as I do? I ought to be thankful that what I'm going through is only a little pinch. I ought to be thankful that I'm given this opportunity to learn and grow. Because after this, I will emerge stronger. I will learn an experience that I can in turn, share with others. I can offer help and encouragement to others going through the same thing I've been through, which is really, what life should be about-- to help one another and to be able to be a part of a hope that rebuilds another life.

My friend is part of that hope. He finds great satisfaction in knowing that he has been a part of building up someone else's life. If an unbeliever can do that and find contentment in it, shouldn't it all the more be the case for believers? It is probably, the blessing that God is trying to pour over us. It is probably, the purpose we are seeking so hard for.

Pray, believe, and act.

I am a hypocrite writing this. But I hope this will not be a permanent fact. I hope soon, I can proudly proclaim that what I have written here is a proven truth.

For the first time, I felt real rejection. The working world is practical. I guess everything is about gains and benefits. Once I lose value to them, I dont get even the chance to speak. Im out.

But luckily I regained composure the next day. And I continue to strive. With His strength and encouragement.

And today, my hopes and confidence are crushed once more. Im still standing, still able to go on. Im just wondering, how long can I last like that? Having my hopes, confidence and motivation crushed and then persuading myself to look forward again. This cycle. I know it's not going to end anytime soon. It may even last forever.

Thank God. He reminded me, that I have Him to lean on. He will not let me go through things I cannot take. And a close friend's prayer today reminded me too, that God will always provide a way for me. Indeed, rough times make me realise how much I need to rely on God's faithfulness, grace and mercy.

Im unhappy. But I know this will pass and things will get better soon. Just cry my heart out to Him now. Tomorrow will be a better day.

And so im back. After quite some time.

No doubt everyone comes to a crossroad at different points of their lives. Somehow I feel that each crossroad gets one into a deeper dilemma than the last. And if one is not careful, I suppose it is that easy to get lost in the mulitudes of paths.

I try to be positive when I write here. I try to be encouraging. After all, the choice of words can bring about a twist to anything you may mean to say. But sometimes, it's just difficult to stay positive all the time. I may be all smiles, but honestly, I think im one of the most pessimistic person ever. So forgive me. Let me rant in this post. I need some avenue to vent my frustrations.

I am lost. For now, at least. Why cant I seem to figure out what I want? Each path I take, some may indeed be my own choice. But others, they are just choices im forced to make either because of circumstances or because... I dont know. It just happened. It happened, and I know that is not the choice I want for myself, but I dont know how it happened.

Im getting more and more unhappy as I grow up, as I enter one phase into another. It's like im following the motions. I may not be ready to move, but there're no other alternatives. Something is nudging me, pushing me. I cant figure out why im so unhappy. And im getting less and less familiar with the current me. Who am I? I dont think I was like that. And im so afraid that people important to me will feel disappointed with me. Im afraid that they will start to get impatient with me.

Sometimes, running away seems enticing. Sometimes, giving up seems easier.

I kind of have an idea why things have come to this. And I may know the solution to this. But like I said earlier, let me just rant in this post.

I wish I can be up in the sky, amongst the clouds. Till when? Im not too sure when I'll like to come down either.
But even in the beautiful, peaceful skies, storms can occur.

So Weightless-- David Choi

I only know, not everyone sees
Something there beyond the breeze
A lioness stare, blond wavy hair
Beautiful, so hard not to care

Every move I make, gets closer to you
Reach your hand out
Should I grab or should I go

Im feeling so weightless
I dont know what
I dont know how
I ended up in this cloud
Im feeling so helpless
I dont know when
I dont know how
Im ever gonna get down

I got a question can I stay for a while?
Im liking it here but am I on file?
I just want to talk, but you seem so far
Fading away, just like a star

Just before you could answer
You've drifted away
Left me here alone, but right now im feeling ok

Im feeling so weightless
I dont know what
I dont know how
I ended up in this cloud
Im feeling so helpless
I dont know when
I dont know how
Im ever gonna get down

Before I know it I cant help but wonder
My friends are waiting for me but if I could just stay here
So caught up in bliss, where is my answer?

Im feeling so weightless
I dont know what
I dont know how
I ended up in this cloud
Im feeling so helpless
I dont know when
I dont know how
Im ever gonna get down

Feeling so weightless... feeling so weightless...